我會努力地不去理會
不該理會的人
^^



因為你說過
"不要去理會她"
所以
我會加油的!








30/9/2009
你拿著手機拍下我們的合照的那天...

 i'm seriously going to faint from exhaustion
one of these days



just wondering where will it be
out on the streets?
in school?
home?



疲れすぎる

 i think i'm really really fortunate to have Beatrice as my friend
not only is she pretty, sexy and funny
she has helped me a lot
through all these nonsense
:)



dishing out gem-worthy advices
teaching me not to be so naive
not to trust people so easily
be my pillar of strength when i'm weak
listen to me when i'm hurt
encouraging me to go forth



her maturity and wisdom
is shining ever so brightly in situations like this now
thank you for being my friend

 




二日前に
同級生は私にＭＳＮでこれを聞きました。
「ダフ二、映画を見たいか？
一緒に見ましょうよ〜」



私は...即時に...
「はい！見たいです！Ｌｅｔ’ｓ　ｇｏ」



ハハハ
そして私達が六人で学校を終わる前に
映画を見に行きます〜




私は「良い」学生なぁ　〜
（笑）

初めてよ！初めてよ！
Don't be mistaken!



皆さんも女の子です〜
Girls' time!
新しい同級生は面白い人だから
楽しかったです！
本当に嬉しいよ　〜
：Ｄ



私達は見た映画というのは「２０１２」
この映画を見る時
泣きました
But...
But...
I only cried when I see the animals almost dying/in danger
When the people are in danger,
I don't really pity them or worry for them
But when the chicken is going to get its head chopped off
Or when the dog is going to drown
Or when the dog is walking precariously on the pipes
That's when my heart almost stopped


多分私も　cold person　ね
人間より動物のほうが関心する



２０１２は本当に "Ｅｎｄ　ｏｆ　Ｗｏｒｌｄ"　ですか？
Ｉ　ｄｏｎ’ｔ　ｔｈｉｎｋ　ｓｏ．

Ok ok, 1 last ranting post
before I blog about happyyyyyyy stuff
:D



Was feeling super moody
after completing my Japanese exam



I can see
marks flying away from me left, right and center!



This year's paper seems tougher
But then again
I wasn't sure if I felt it was tough
because the standard was indeed raised higher
OR
i simply did not study enough for it



if i had studied harder and earlier
would i not find it tough anymore?
i think this time i'll only get 80+ marks at most



I felt that I've let myself down
Like really really let myself down
This feeling sucks.





-------


Standing there
hiding from the rain
lightning striking and thunder roaring


plugged into my mp3 player
in the midst of a chaotic crowd walking me by


reading your blog on my handphone
your entry is the only thing that brought a smile to my face
making me forget my unhappiness



You're my solace.

 啊~~~
不安的心情
還是忍不住油然而生
其實只要不要求完美
心就能夠平靜下來了吧?
你到底是在拼什麼啊, 吳芝萱
看著時間一步一步逼近
該讀的東西還很多...
不安啊!!!
大大的不安!!!
已經處於半放棄的狀態了嗎?
相不相信我有很認真的考慮過
重讀一年才升 Advanced 啊
就是那麼嚴重
因為我認為Intermediate這一年
完全被老師換來換去給影響到了
結果學得很亂七八糟
可是...
金錢方面
很不符合經濟效益耶



唉唷
誰能來救救我啊
完美主義
拿掉! 拿掉!



Edit:
壓力好大啊
自己給自己的壓力好大啊
幸好Beatrice也要重讀Intermediate
所以就這樣決定了
明年重讀!
雖然還是覺得有點浪費錢的說...
可是我當初讀日文
不就是為了能夠好好了解這個語言嗎?
而不是以最快, 最好的成績通過考試而已

 I can't believe I did it again !
I remembered the day of exam wrongly!
1stly, i mistook the essay exam to be on a friday when it was actually thursday!
And I made that realization only on ... tuesday?
But luckily for me, it was easy and i breezed through even without much preparation



And now ...
I EVEN REMEMBERED WRONGLY FOR THE GRAMMAR EXAM!
Wah kao eh!
What is wrong with me?
Seriously!
Guess what is the best part?
Realizing the mistake only ONE day before the actual day
GREAT.



To think that yesterday
 when my RP classmate asked me if i had prepared for the school exam
i answered him no
and he said "wah, so steady ar? so smart ar u?"
then i replied because i was busy preparing for other exam
and he said "got so hiong meh? the japanese one"
anyway,
RP exam is open-book so it's easy



So here I am
On a 'lovely' tuesday morning
With only 9 hours to spare
I'm going to cram as much as I can into my brains
And go die honourably in the exam room
Hope miracles happen lah
死馬也要當活馬醫了!



Chan Shuhui,
if i get distinction for my Japanese exam again
YOU ARE GOING TO GIVE ME A TREAT
:D

 好了, 好了
就讓紛爭停止吧
從現在開始
請嘗試過著自己的生活
反正他也已經為了夢想而努力了
不是嗎?
所以我們在這裡
言語抨擊來, 言語抨擊去
很愚昧, 不是嗎?
我們應該向他學習
朝夢想邁進
你也加油吧
就這樣
我累了

 不能夠太幸福啊
因為當夜深人靜
思緒來潮時
寂寞感更甚強烈

 




sometimes i wonder,
why must it be so tiring to like you
why must i be attacked and hurt by other girls
when all i did was to like you with all my heart
be good to you, be the person you can go to when you're feeling weak
i want to listen to all your troubles, anxieties, sorrows
and give you care and concern
i want to share your joy
cheer for you at the stadium, be proud of you

then i saw how one girl who was rumoured to be one of the players' girlfriend
being gossiped behind her back, criticised, hated
and i understood
anyone that is romantically linked to the players
are bound to become the public hate enemy
luckily for her, she is strong and independent enough to not let those people affect her
but me?
i'm just a fragile girl with gentle personality
this kind of game is not for me

"how i wish you are a normal person"
this thought always come to me when i am crying
but you are, right? you are a normal person
it is the other girls who put you on the pedestal and idolise you

to have hurtful things said right in my face
to have them cause emotional stress to me
and when you allow that group of girls on that night to touch me
i was pushed around and pulled away by them
it was no longer just emotional and psychological hurt, it was physical
you didn't realise that, did you?
you did not see their actions, did you?
if you had, you would have stopped them
but at least you apologised later that night

when you messaged me on your own accord
after knowing how i was hurt by a girl
you said you never send message to people first right? you always reply to messages only
but now you are messaging me first ...
i was so touched and happy
so happy that my heart doesn't hurt anymore
your concern has taken away my pain
it doesn't matter anymore
at that point of time, i feel that i could stand up again as long as you're with me
and when you suddenly assured me on that night that you don't even talk to her often
i was totally surprised and happy
you were trying to put my mind at ease, right?
thank you
i was really really happy then
especially when you confirm with me again the accusation she tried to throw on me
i could feel your trust in me

if only i had agreed to all your invitations in the past
we would be going to kinokuniya to read together
we would be sitting at starbucks
we would be watching movies
we would be having heart-to-heart chats at night
we would be hanging out with each other's friends
i would be showing you all my childhood places, all the places i love to go to
you would be bringing me to try korean cuisines
i would be teaching you chinese, you would be teaching me japanese...
we would be so sweet
we won't be wasting precious time like what we are doing right now
i'm sorry for rejecting your invitations because i was too too too shy
i'm really sorry now ...

you're the first person i like
who brought so much pain and hurt upon me
not by you, but by the other girls
3 different group of girls
three. this is crazy.
that's a crazy amount of people.
they have changed me.
i'm no longer a happy and simple girl

it's so painful
everything is so painful right now